DIY Resolutions

I am famous for wanting to do a project, saying I'm going to do it and then getting sidetracked so far away from the project that the project is but a speck on the horizon.

That is NOT going to happen this year.

Because this home was a temporary one 2 years ago, I put off a lot of home projects. Why bother? We're not going to be here for long. But, as it turns out, we are going to be here for another 2 years.

I'm noot putting it off for another 2 years which will turn in 6 years because we plan to buy a house in 2 years and I know my head will swim with ideas for the new house and the projects currently in my head...horizonly speckish.

I have 6 projects that I want to finish by the end of the summer.

And I've already started a few! Go me!

1. Redo the bedrooms. All 3.

I was going to wait until we moved Graysen to a toddler bed to redo his room. But then I changed my mind. I had a major epiphany last week so obviously I started on his room this weekend. I have a few more things to buy and a lot more things to hang up but we're sitting at about 70% completion.

I'm stumped on Kadyn's rooms. He's been asking for a Transformers room but his room is currently Cars themed and I'm really not all that jazzed about character decor to begin with. I'm researching a soldier bedroom. Pretty sure Kadyn will forget the Transformers dealy if he walks into his very own bunker!

And then there is our room. All we really need is a paint job and new curtains. And maybe some new bedding. Unfortunately I don't think we're allowed to paint. Rentals FTL!! Not sure what I'm going to do about our room. Currently it's in the best shape out of the 3 so it will probably be left to last.

4. Fix this.

That graffiti may not be there now but if that wall is left barren and stark for much longer, I am positive a gaggle of hoodlums is going to bust in my house and tag the crap out of that wall.  I bought some picture shelves from Ikea and I have a Groupon for CanvasPop to use.

Hoodlums beware!

5. Fix this, too.

That microwave shelf/stand/thing came from the old house and I hated it when I bought it. It's hard to love a laminated fake wood microwave stand from Wal-mart.

It used to house the phone you see haphazardly hanging on the wall and all of our paperwork. A makeshift desk, if you will.

But not only is Graysen into pulling everything off the shelf and throwing it around the kitchen, he's also into pushing it around the kitchen. And calling random people at 6 am.

Those wheels? Don't have locks.

The whole wall is a mess. And the plants are taking over the top of the plant stand.

Why can't I put plants on the other two shelves? Are you paying attention??

G. R. A. Y. S. E. N.

AKA Destructo Child

Here's my plan for the space:

It won't be red, it might not have drawers and I'm hoping for a counter top rather than a wood top but that's the look I'm going for.

Want one, too? Look no further than Pinterest!

6. Another Pinterest find:

I've been searching for a play kitchen for the boys for what seems like forever. The plastic ones are junk. And they are ugly. And so overpriced! I wanted to make one of those rad entertainment unit kitchens last summer but I was all pregnant and shit.

This? This is happening this spring.

Fo shizzle.

Want one? Look no further than... *everybody now!* PINTEREST!

If you know me at all, you know I am sitting here just vibrating about these projects. If I had my way, they would have all been done over the weekend. 

But, alas, tis just not possible.

I'm giving myself about 3 months to get the bedrooms and the living room wall done. Then it's BUILDING TIME!!!

Guys, I'm freaking stoked!

Wordless Wednesday

A Very Important Message

The entire school was gathered in the carpeted amphitheatre of my junior high school.

Another boring assembly. Yay!

This wasn't a routine school assembly, we had a guest speaker.

Even better. 

Everyone loves hour long talks about drugs, drinking, sex or bullying from some random police officer or nurse.

After all the classes had been seated on the risers, the principal introduced the speaker. I wasn't paying attention.

The woman took the stage and began talking....

"Some of you may know me. I am Jennifer's mother."

(Jennifer was a student at the school. We had been good friends the year before.)

"I am here today to tell you a very difficult story.

Not long ago Jennifer's sister, Crystal, celebrated her 18th birthday. Several of us celebrated with Crystal at a pub near our house.

At the end of the night, Crystal got on the back of her boyfriend's motorcycle and rode home. I got in my car with my boyfriend and drove home.

I don't remember anything after that.

I woke up in the hospital two days later.

The nurses told me that I had been in an accident. 

That I had hit a motorcycle.

That there was a girl on the motorcycle.

And that girl died."

It's been more than 15 years since that assembly but I remember it like it was yesterday.

I remember her talking about how she was so hysterical at the scene of the accident that night that the paramedics heavily sedated her and sent her to the hospital. She was medicated and on suicide watch for months after. She was never left alone and spent most of her time in therapy trying to do something with what she had done.

Trying to come to terms with something, she felt, she had no right to come to terms with.

I don't know why this stuck with me the way it did.

Drunk driving is nearing epidemic levels in the city I live in so, sadly, it seems like it would be easy to become desensitized to it.

And let's face it, adolescents don't listen for shit.

But I have never forgotten this story.

I think about it every time I hear a story on the news about a drunk driver.

Like this one.

Or this one. 

Or this one. 

That last one? 

My husband travels that highway frequently. One of his co-workers is on that highway pretty much every single day.

Needless to say that story hit close to home.

But all of them do.

I felt the torture and anguish in Crystal's Mom's voice. I still feel it today.

Every single person affected by drunk driving feels that.

And there is NO reason for it.

There is NO reason to get in your car and drive after you've had a few drinks. 

NONE whatsoever.

Call a cab.

Call a friend.

Sleep in your car.

Do ANYTHING but get behind the wheel and drive.

ANYTHING.

All of these 'accidents' were 150% PREVENTABLE.

NONE of those people had to die.

NONE of those families deserve to lose someone to something so senseless.

I beg all of you to think of these stories the next time you are considering getting in your car after imbibing.

Think about what that drive home is worth to you.

And please share this. 

I am just one person, with one tiny space on the internet.

Sometimes that's all it takes.

Conversations with Kadyn

Kadyn was eating a snack not long ago. He was lookin' all cute and stuff and I was watching him, soaking up the cuteness.

Kadyn notices me watching him and asks, "What?"

I say, "I love you."

Kadyn gets up, walks over to me, gives me a hug, looks up at me with gigantic puppy dog eyes and says, "Mama, I want you to marry me."

I say, "Aw, honey. You're too sweet but I can't marry you, babe."

"Why not?" he asks.

"Well because I'm married to Daddy and cause you're my kid, I can't marry my kid."

"No, not now." He tells me, "When I'm a taller man."

"Oh, I see. Well I still can't marry you, babe. You can't marry your mama, sweetheart.

"Oh. Ok," he says frowning.

Schooled!

You know what baffles me?

The whole raising a kid thing.

(Little late, eh?)

But really, what the hell?

To drive a car, you must take a test (or in my case THREE.)

To become a doctor, you must go to school for eleventy billion years.

The sell freaking shoes, you must go through some sort of training.

It might be delivered by a way-past-his-prime Al Bundy look alike, but there is training nonetheless.

To have a baby, all you have to do is find some punk to bump uglies with, get as big as a house, blow out your hoo-hoo and off you go for a lifetime of insanity pink puffy hearted love.

Being able to do the nasty is the only prerequisite to having a baby. And judging by Maury, it's pretty darn easy to figure out.

Babies are easy peasy for me. Feed, burp, change, tickle, sleep. Rinse and repeat.

Yes, I know, babies wake up 14 times a night and they occasionally scream for hours and hours and hours for no reason at all.

I had TWO colicky babies, I know ALLLLLLLL about being up ALLLLLLL night with a baby who will not stop screaming.

And I still say babies are easy.

Toddlers and preschoolers are the tricky ones.

And I have one of each! YAY!

(I'm convinced toddlers are a tiny slice of hell on earth. But that's for another time.)

Now that the baby portion of my mama-ing is over, I'm a little lost.

Actually a lot lost.

I'm a little embarrassed to admit that, I feel like I should know what to do but I worked in marketing and office management before I became a mama, not early childhood education.

Or ANY sort of education for that matter.

And since Kadyn does not attend a traditional preschool, the bulk of his education is left up to me.

I'm not proud to say that I floundered around lost and useless until a couple weeks ago when I Googled "preschool at home."

(I SWEAR I Googled this months and months ago and found nothing. SMH)

I clicked the first search result and landed here.

And then I found the Preschool for the Year package.

Are you kidding me!?!?!

I took a look through the sample curriculum and bought the full year immediately.

I was not disappointed.

In addition to the 10 month curriculum, there is a summer curriculum, a set of flash cards, 3 sets of posters and 6 other files full of games and activities.

It's a HELL of a lot of printing (186 pages for January alone) but printing each month in it's entirety is not necessary. (Each month has it's own alphabet and numbers set. I won't be printing that each month.) I could view each lesson plan on my computer and print the activity sheets as needed but I opted to print everything and then organize it into a binder (with page protectors and file folders and dividers!! Oh, my!!)

Now, I don't LOVE how this is (un)organized. None of the pages are numbered or titled so you have manually match up the lesson plan with the corresponding activity sheets (and some are used in multiple lessons) and who the heck does anything manually these days?

Once you get everything sorted (if you are printing like crazy me) it's a breeze.

Each month starts with a calendar:

And each day has a lesson plan.

Each lesson consists of seven components: Spark!, Learning Circle, Discovery, Creative Art, Music, Story and Game. And the activities include everything from connect the dots to sorting, matching, memory and patterning games as well as activities and crafts done with household items and other craft supplies. 

What I love most is how adaptable this program is. It's suitable for a single child or a group of children but   it's also easily adaptable to my child and his abilities and learning needs. I don't follow each lesson exactly so it feels like more of a helpful tool that gives me ideas and direction than a rigid curriculum. It's easy and I really like that.

Kadyn asks to 'do preschool stuff' almost every day so I think he likes it, too.

And I can tuck it all away to use with Graysen when he's ready. Love that!

This week we've been learning about winter animals and how they hibernate, migrate or adapt to cold weather.

Did you know that bears in Canada build dens out of paper plates, construction paper, tape and pipe cleaners?

Canadian Bears....not your av-er-age bear, eh, Boo boo?


(This is not a sponsored post, all opinions are my own. For more information visit www.kidsparkz.com)

Wordless Wednesday

Whatchoo talkin' 'bout, Walters?

I watch The View.

I know. But you have to admit, as far as talk shows go, it's head and shoulders above the rest. Not that that's saying much.

And I usually spend most of the hour cursing Elizabeth in my head.

Last week she was blabbering on about the sanctity of broadcast television.

::blink::

::blink::

Normally nothing said on The View (or any show) bothers me enough to do anything.

1. It's TV

2. If I did something every time someone said something that bothered me, well, I'd be doing A LOT of stuff.

But today Barbara crossed the line.

Well, if I being really honest, her hair crossed the line last week.

What is up with her hair this year? It is not pretty.

(I'd show you a picture but apparently there are no pictures of Barbara in 2012 on the internet.)

This morning the ladies were talking about the Golden Globes and, of course, all the fabulous gowns and dresses of the night. And they talked about Ricky Gervais' comments about Madonna and her sex life.

I don't know about you but I am dying to hear about the goings on of Madonna's ray of light.

Not really.

Then they switched to Angelina Jolie.

Blah, blah, blah....

I wish I had the conversation on video. But I don't. So you'll just have to settle for my recap.

The ladies were talking about Angelina and her dress and how skinny she is (blah, blah, blah) and then "Well, look at Madonna...."

The gist of the conversation was that Barbara thinks both Madonna and Angelina need to cut back on the weights BIG TIME.

Because nobody likes a woman with lots of muscles - especially big shoulders and super buff arms.

NOBODY.

In case you missed the Globes, here is a side by side of muscly monsters:

I don't even know what to say here. How could ANYONE ever think that these woman are super buff? Or that they're arms are far too muscular.

Angelina needs to eat a freaking sandwich. Dipped in gravy.

She does not look muscular, she looks anorexic.

Madonna, for once, looks like a normal human being. Well, except for her off-putting cleavage. Either way, not 'too muscular' by any means.

What I was most bothered by was Barbara Walters saying how woman should not have big muscles because it is not attractive - and then using two stick-figured celebs as examples of what 'too much muscle' looks like.

No, Barbara. Just no.

You know what too much muscle is?

This:

And to look like this, a woman would need to spend YEARS practically living in the gym and juicing herself full of steroids.

I don't doubt Madge and Angie have injected themselves with a few concoctions over the years but I highly doubt anabolic steroids was one of them.

Shame on you, Barbara. You are perpetuating the notion that woman should be delicate little creatures who bunny hop out miles and miles and miles on treadmills and ellipticals. There is nothing wrong with women lifting weights (that are not pink or 5 lbs) and there is nothing wrong with women who have muscles.

Conversations with Kadyn...

By far one of the best conversations with Kadyn EVER....

It was about 6:30 in the morning. We had all just woken up, Kadyn just a few minutes after the rest of us.

I was sitting on the couch with Graysen, Ryan was in the kitchen and Kadyn was standing beside the coffee table, eyes still puffy with sleep.

"Dad!" Kadyn calls, "Where's my firetruck?"

Ryan comes into the doorway to the living room and says, "Under the table, bud. Right there."

Kadyn looks around but still looks lost. "Under where, Dad?"

"Under the coffee table," Ryan answers.

**Loooooooong pause**

"DAAAAAAD!!!!" Kadyn says incredulously, "You made me say underwear!"

Going Forward

Last year was a rough one.

I would say the roughest year Ryan and I have had in the 10 years we've been together.

I started the year with a horrible case of stress-induced hives, Ryan's job nearly ended our marriage, he got a new job that nearly destroyed us financially (better than destroying our family), Kadyn broke his arm and needed surgery to fix it, Ryan made a trip the hospital within days of Kadyn's hospital stay, I felt like we spent most of the year dealing with some revolving sickness or another and I dealt with some pretty significant extended family drama (that I'm not certain is over yet.)

Not to mention countless other things that only added to the feeling that 2011 was a year of endurance. I feel like I spent most of the year telling myself to 'just get through this and things will get better.'

Don't get me wrong, there were good things about last year - we celebrated the boys' birthdays with kick ass parties, I got my license....um....yeah, I think that's it.

I was so very ready for 2011 to end.

Fresh start!!

I'm rolling over a few goals/resolutions/whatever from last year.

And I have a few more to add:

1) Make more time for me

I have fully devoted my life to my kids for the last 4.5 years. I've sacrificed, gone without, put off, put up with, gave in and gave up on a lot of things for my family.

I'm not complaining, it was my choice. But it's taken it toll on me for sure and I'm feeling like my family might be in place where I can step back just a little bit. Or at least I will be able to next autumn when Kadyn goes to school, I have a full license and my own vehicle.

I want to get back in the gym in a major, major way, I want to start - and keep - a few hobbies, I want to take some classes (art, photography, parenting), I want to read at least one book a month, I want to get my hair done more than twice a year, I want to overhaul my wardrobe. I want to stop identifying myself as nothing more than a mother.

2) Start writing things down and making plans

A failure to plan is a plan to fail!

Right!!?!

I want to get shit done!!

Keeping everything in my head is exhausting and is just not working for me anymore. And I feel I could accomplish much more if I wrote stuff down.

3) Get our spending under control

We do pretty well financially but we spend way too much money on crap and we're still trying to get back to were we were last spring. We have a very small amount of credit card debt to get rid of and then it's SAVE SAVE SAVE!

4) Give more

I've been harassing Ryan to start sponsoring a couple kids through World Vision and we will be starting that this year. I also want to find a few causes we, as a family, can be passionate about. We've done a few things over the years but nothing consistent. This needs to change.

5) Learn Spanish

I know a teeny bit from our honeymoon in Mexico and I've been learning more with Kadyn but I want to be fluent. Hopefully I can teach Kadyn and Graysen as well. Kadyn knows as much as I do and loves it so I might as well capitalize on it!

Plus I really want to stick my head out my front door and yell at my kids in Spanish. Ha!

I have high hopes for 2012. I feel like this is going to be a great year for us.

If nothing else, it's got to be better than last year!

Right!?!?

Wordless Wednesday

Annual Review (Or How Lame Can Your Post Title Be?!)

As I said yesterday, I've been doing a lot of thinking. And I've come to the realization that I'm not altogether pleased with my life.

Don't get me wrong. I am very grateful and happy with all that I have. And I have a lot! But there is also a lot I want to change and improve.

We are not the best we can be.

And mediocrity is not a good look for me.

Last year was probably the hardest year Ryan and I have had in the 10 years we've been together. On three separate occasions, I was sure I was going to lose it. I feel like I spent most of the year just barely getting through. And so I didn't exactly meet all the goals I set.

I haven't look at those goals since the middle of 2011.

Let's review, shall we?

1) Get back to eating well and moving more

I did not do so well on this.

Unless you count a couple months of stress-induced anorexia** in which I dropped over 20lbs without really trying.

In all honesty, I don't know how to fit exercise into my life right now. Currently the only time I could do anything would be after the kids are in bed and let's be real, I am not trying to do an hour+ of hard core exercise at 8:30 pm. I'm just not.

So the goal moving forward is to eat smart and try to be as active as I can, when I can. And I don't do too badly at this.

For example, while all the other parents are sitting on their asses (glued to their smart phone) at the indoor playground, I spent a good amount of our visit actually playing with my kids.

People, getting this body through a climbing structure made for small people ain't easy!

Come fall, I will be shopping for a new gym and then ya'll better WATCH OUT!

**I was not really anorexic. Apparently when I am stressed, I do the opposite of pretty much the entire planet - I completely lose my appetite and almost completely stop eating. It's not healthy, it's not the way I wanted to lose weight and it was not a fantastic time in my life. But I did drop 3 sizes!

2) Be more of the Mama I want to be and less of the one I don't want to be

I'm going to give myself a solid B here.

I had some major, major horrible, terrible, no good mama moments this year. I am not proud of any of them. But I've also made some really great strides that have definitely changed Kadyn and my relationship.

I plan to take a parenting class or two this year - it's not like these eating/sleeping/pooping machines come with any manuals or anything - and to also make more time to read parenting books and magazines.

3) Less yelling

No excuses, ya'll, but sometimes yelling at Kadyn is the only way to get his attention or get him to listen.

I read an article on preschooler brains not long ago. The writer said that preschool to elementary aged children can not split their attention and are often 'hyper-focused.'

Ever ask your kid to do something while he's watching TV or otherwise engaged?

I don't know about you, but it's futile around these parts. And there are times that I have tried everything to get his attention with no success at all. (Turning off the TV just sparks a volcanic meltdown which puts us about 50 giants steps behind where we started. I feel I HAVE to yell on some occasions. And on those occasions, I can physically see Kadyn 'snap out of it.'

I don't exactly like this, but I do what I have to.

I am, however, getting much better at not yelling because I am angry. Go me!

Again, parenting classes, books, magazines.

4) Lose the anger

After this year, I have a whole lot more reasons to be angry.

I'm letting it go.......

5) Get my license

I DID IT!!! I GOT MY LICENSE!!!!

It hit me suddenly that my not having a license could, and most likely would, affect Kadyn's schooling next year. I don't know why this was such a big deal considering my inability to drive has greatly affected our lives for the past 4.5 years, but school was the kick in the pants I needed.

I'm not free and clear yet though.

I can't drive between midnight and 5 am (but really, I'm out of my house between those hours MAYBE once a year) and I can't drive without a fully licensed passenger. And I HAVE to pass my road test in August.

Yeah, I cut it that close.

6) Read the manuals for my camera and video camera

Fail.

I didn't read a few blog posts about cameras and photography I found on Pinterest.

That counts, right?

7) Reevaluate this blog

There was a time this year when I contemplated shutting 'er down entirely. I'm just not sure I really have anything to offer. I don't have a niche or anything unique to write about. It's just me and our life.

But I am keeping 'er going. I love that I can look back (even now, not even 2 years in) and read about our craziness.

Sometimes I get a little forlorn looking at blogs with 7, 438 followers and 898 comments on a post but WHATEVER! I started this blog for me and my family and to maybe build a nice little community of e-friends.

I feel I have accomplished both of those things and so....onward!

8) Figure out the message

Was I high when I wrote this post?

Seriously.

I was going to include my goals for this year but I think I've rambled on enough already. Another day!

Did you set goals or resolutions last year? How'd you do with them?

Holiday Recap

Has anyone gotten on that brain to blog device yet?

Cause I've been writing posts in my head every day but they obviously aren't getting to ya'll.

Ridiculous.

To recap:

Christmas was nice and quiet.

And stripey...

How awesome are those PJ's!?!?!

Santa brought the boys a wicked awesome train table as well as an appropriate amount of other goodies. After presents we had Christmas breakfast and then hung around watching movies - Santa brought The Lion King and Cars 2 for us.

We ate Christmas dinner in front of the TV watching Shrek- that's Christmas-y, right? The movie was on a regular TV station so there were commercials. One of which was the Justin Beiber Mistletoe propaganda. I turned to Kadyn and said, "Hey bud, do you like Just Beiber?"

Kadyn chewed and swallowed his mouthful, looked at me and said, as serious as could be, "Watch your mouth, Mom!"

HA!

Ryan had the week between Christmas and New Year's Day off so we did a WHOLE LOTTA family stuff. It was really awesome! It's been a very long time since we've all been able to spend that much time together.

I could DEFINITELY get used to Ryan being home all the time.

We managed to score a sitter for NYE so we went out! Nothing extravagant. Just a little shindig at one of our best friend's place. There's probably nowhere else I'd go for NYE. It's always a good time!

And that was our holidays.

Nice and quiet with tons of family time. Just the way I like it!

Now it's all reality and stuff.

BOOOOO!!!!

The upside of reality is that Ryan was offered a promotion before Christmas. I'm trying my very hardest to be optimistic with just a side of caution. The new position means a company truck (which solves our problem and having to buy a second vehicle later in the year) and a fairly substantial raise. It also means more responsibility and (hopefully not) more out of town work. The deal was that, in taking this position, they would keep Ryan in town MORE but I know this company and this job. I know how they roll.

But there is a very good chance this will be GREAT for us. Fingers crossed!!

As for me? I've been doing that "OMG IT'S A NEW YEAR MY LIFE SUCKS I NEED TO CHANGE IT NOW!!!" thing.

More on that tomorrow!

Hope everyone had fantastic holidays! For many of you, reality sets back in today. Hope she's not too hard on ya'll!